A caregiver’s guide to pesky breast cancer (Maria Heck, Pt. 8)

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I’ve received a multitude of correspondence from breast cancer patients who have read my blog posts and columns, as well as their significant others.  One reader told me that I’d opened his eyes to the back story his wife endured, and that he had learned things of which he was previously unaware.  This makes me […]

The trials and tribulations of tatas (Maria Heck, Pt. 7)

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We all know October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, right?  And you know what that means!  We talk about boobies! Jugs! Knockers! Bazookas! Life is funny.  Even ironic! Growing up, I ‘developed’ very early.  I loathed my Play Dough form.  My body couldn’t handle the extra cargo at such a young age.  None of my […]

Boob Voyage, final destination (Maria Heck, Pt 6.)

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En route to the hospital last week, cloaked in a cocoon of inky pre-dawn smog, I turned to my husband and asked: »Aren’t you sick of making this trip? » He responded: « Aren’t you? » What a stupid question.  Of course! We were travelling to my tenth breast revision procedure.  I’ve decided that it was time to just […]

Dismantling and reassembling the Maria (Maria Heck, Pt 5.)

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Do you ever feel like your entire life is a freak show…and you have front row seats?  Pull up a chair and enjoy the latest installment in the series I call: “Maria’s Breast Case Scenario.” Having a double mastectomy can be a one-time deal.  That is, opting not to go forward with an implant and […]

Again (Maria Heck, Pt 4.)

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Raise your hand if you’re sick and tired of reading about my boobs!  The only hand I see raised is that of my husband. Well, he doesn’t count, so here I go! Listen, I’ve been rejected for many things in my life; the cheerleading team in 10th grade (I had to settle for Drill Team, […]

Laverne and Shirley (Maria Heck, Pt 3)

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I really thought I’d completed all parts of the puzzle that is breast cancer….finally!  I am now a new and improved version of my old self.  Well, one puzzle piece is, anyway. I must say that the people around me were reverent, sympathetic, and respectful when speaking about my breast cancer. But the same can’t […]

Thing One and Thing Two (Maria Heck, Pt 2)

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Humpty Maria sat on a wall, Humpty Maria had a great fall……  Several seasons of Real Housewives ago, I was on sabbatical.  I was entertaining an inconvenient episode of breast cancer. When you first hear the word “cancer” you think “Ohhhh…crap!”  “Please no not me!”  I discovered that those of a certain generation tend to […]

The Girls (Maria Heck, Pt 1)

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Several years ago, upon the eve of Breast Cancer Awareness Month, I was personally made aware.  I noticed a lump, about the size of a pea, under my arm.  You may not know this about me, but I’m hyper-vigilant about my health.  I’m not a “wait and see” kind of a woman.  If I were […]